Sunday, December 21, 2008

Hormones update! Wheee!

A while back I posted about my migraine frustrations as related to my girly business, and am happy to say that I've yielded some splendid results. At the blessing of my girly-parts doctor, I am now on the lowest-estrogen dose pill AND (drum roll) and directed to take the pills straight through, skipping the placebos. For you non-pill takers and dudes out there, that means no periods for MG! It's, like, better than winning the lottery. And it means at least FOUR fewer migraines per month, which is like 200 times better than winning the lottery.

After charting my headaches for 6 months I noticed the migraine/ period trend, which is how I convinced my Dr. that extreme measures were required. The strange thing is that the two other times I charted my headaches in the past I found no such correlation. Apparently, hormones fluctuate once a woman passes age 30 -- and here I thought that age just began my descent into crone-dom and a signal to begin preparing to become a Crazy Cat Lady. Guess I should've paid more attention in high school health class, but I was usually too busy trying to not pass out.

While I am thrilled about the new therapy and decline of monthly migraines, I do also occasionally worry that I will end up like that great SNL commercial parody and just go batshit crazy one of these months. *Crosses fingers and hopes for best*

Of course, I found a downside. Published in the UK in August, I only stumbled upon a story in a magazine at the salon last week in which British researchers found that "Body odour plays an important part in mate selection but the Pill appears to interfere with a woman's sense of smell, undermining her capacity to make the best choice" and that "Opposites attract – in gender and in genes. But the study revealed that instead of going for genetically dissimilar mates, as human beings are instinctively inclined to do, women on the Pill tended to select men more genetically similar to themselves" (The Independent).

Oh, good. So I guess that explains why I keep dating fabulously intelligent, funny, hot, and sexy men with no desire to commit. Great. ;) Maybe I can hire some sort of bloodhound to sniff out my potential dates in the future? Maybe this is the next frontier in dating: forget online dating or matchmakers, hire a dog!

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